• Can you identify any issues with your current relationship / current partner that may be impacting on your sexuality?
• Think about anything significant that may have happened prior to the problem starting to occur. For example comments made by partners, a change in partner, a negative experience related to sex.
• What are your general thoughts about intercourse? Are there any feelings of shame or guilt?
• Have you experienced any previous sexual trauma?
• During intercourse do you feel any embarrassment, inhibition or anxiety?
• Do you feel like you may have difficulty with desire to have sex or difficulty getting aroused? The issue may be better treated as issues with sexual desire or arousal.
• Does it feel too hard work to orgasm during intercourse?
• The experience of masturbation can be different from the experience of intercourse. Think about what this means for you in terms of trying to bridge the gap between masturbation and intercourse.
• Do you fantasise during masturbation and during intercourse? What is different between the two?
• Do you concentrate on trying to relax through intercourse? Tensing the physical body may be more helpful.
• Would you and your partner benefit from more education about sex.

• Do you have a reasonable understanding of your own body and its sexual needs?
• Can you communicate these needs to your partner?
• When you are engaging in sex with your partner, note what thoughts are going through your mind at the time. Are you focusing on other things rather than on the sexual moment?
• Is there any possibility you may be reaching orgasm but are unaware of it?

Once you have established the answers to these questions, it is likely you have uncovered the driver and / or what’s maintaining the issue. You will then need to address this in order to establish healthy sexual functioning.

Other options: Download the Discovery Workbook. The Discovery Workbook takes you on an investigative and reflective journey through potential issues that may be driving the problem. It’s an in-depth look at the issue including questions, activities, reflections and case studies that will assist you in uncovering the essence of the problem. $39.95. To purchase the Discovery Workbook.

Book a Telephone or Skype appointment with your Sex Therapist. Advise us of your preferred time and date and we will endeavour to meet your needs wherever possible. You will receive communication about your booking within 60 minutes. Telephone and Skype appointments are $120.00 for a 60 minute session and are done with maximum convenience to you, in the privacy of your own home or office.

Book a face-to-face Clinic Appointment with Terri OReilly. Clinic rooms are located on Wickham Terrace, Spring Hill. Sessions are 1 hour in duration and are $140.00 per session. Advise us of your preferred time and date and we will endeavour to meet your needs wherever possible. You will receive communication about your booking within 60 minutes.